Karoline's Blog, Uncategorized

Is a date just a flirty job interview? 

Is a date just a flirty job interview?

“Hi my name is Karoline and I would like to apply for the title as your future girlfriend.
Here is my resumé and background….
Omg I also love to travel! What are the odds?”

Pretty damn high if I’m honest.

I’ve never really been a big dater. The sort of girl who go on many dates. I sorta believe in this thing called faith. When its time the universe will guide me to “the one”.
Or “the next one” before “the one”.

All my previous relationships have happened random. A meet cute, a friend of a friend, a summer vacation etc. Nothing was forced or planned. It was just sort of there.

Today I went on my 6th Tinder date…  I’m neither against nor for the app. Loads of people have found exactly what they wanted to find, that being love or lust.
I suppose I’m just a wee bit romantic and telling my future kids how we met would be a boring story.  “He was pretty hot” or “I sent him a dirty GIF.” And seeing that I’m a storyteller that really won’t do now, will it.

I want the story.

I want the full on “How I met your dad” story:

“It was a cold night in the middle of Serbia. Then out of nowhere there, he was. Your Dad. So handsome. Sitting on a white horse wearing a leather jacket. Hawt….
And then he killed the wolf and saved the village…..
We’re been together ever since.” (insert audience going awww)
– kinda story.

Is that too much to ask?

Well, unfortunately, my friends, family, and hormones are not willing to wait any longer for this great wolf warrior to come along and save me.
Hence Tinder…

I mean if you want to find love in this modern digital world you have to use apps.
At least that’s what everybody keeps telling me.
So I try, give up, delete it, try again and round and round we go.

But today I ended up doing what normal people, looking for love, do. I went on a date.
Maybe I’ve been out of it for too long or had given up beforehand, but it was not a raving success. Sorry to kill your vibe.

I have a weird sort of sixth sense. I know right away, some might say instantly, if a guy is going to play a part in my life.
I know instantly if I like him.

And here I knew it instantly. This is not it. I think he knew it too. There’s nothing wrong with it and its no one’s fault. It’s better to find out right away. We’re all looking for the spark and you can’t really feel if it’s there through text.
In some cases, yeah sure you can. You can tell if you’ll have fun on the date etc.
But that magical spark I’m talking about.
You have to meet.
Have to look them in the eyes.
Hear their voice.
Feel their personality.

Now, what do you do, when you both know it’s not there. Do you just excuse yourself and run off.
No. We’re far too polite to do that. So we do the flirty job interview. You may not actually be flirting, but it just means that you keep the conversation light and “sexy” enough so you’re both reminded that this indeed isn’t a job interview. That the purpose of this meeting was originally to end the day with a kiss. Not a handshake.

We walk and talk. Ask politely about his interest and family. All the while knowing you will never see this person again. Not because they’re not a nice person. Just because they didn’t fit the description you had in mind. The job description.

So what have I learned from this tame date. Not a lot to be honest. ‘Cause even if we had been texting for 3 weeks, this might still have happened.
Feelings are a funny thing. No one quite understands them.

So I’m just going to continue walking around, going on flirty job interviews until my wolf warrior comes along and sweeps me off the ground.

But I will be patient for faith has a great way of surprising us. And we love her for it.
I will be ready for that perfect love to hit me like the bus hit Georgina in Mean Girls.

Fast, hard and uncontrollably.

Because that’s what love is. A beautiful mess.

Much love Karoline






Dear Facebook

Dear Facebook
Yes it’s me
I’m still alive.

No, I didn’t run away with a Japanese guy
No, I didn’t show you all the amazing things I saw in Japan
I didn’t even tell you I went to Japan

I let you all down
Made you worry
Some of you even called
to ask if I was okay?
If I had a good vacation?

If I’m being honest I just needed a break
I needed a break from being social
So I could actually be social
So I could join the real world

I know you are suppose to write
a big post about it
and tell you all the things
I hate about modern society
and our lack of social skills

But to be honest I was just tired

Tired of wasting my time and regretting it
Tired of thinking about what other people might think
Tired of living my life for someone else

So I didn’t
I just lived and smiled
It wasn’t groundbreaking or revolutionary
I didn’t do it to inspire or preach
I just did it because I felt like it

And when I feel like returning to the online social society
I will
Just like that


Twenty four

I guess I thought life would be different at twenty four
That I wouldn’t wake up with the smell of wine stuck between my teeth

That I would have gotten sick of kissing strangers
Sick of thinking of the same old love
Sick of regretting the same things

Twenty four seemed like the age I would have my life together
Would know my goals and aim for them
Clean my room and always take out the trash

Always wear high heels for birthdays
Always look my best
But I feel just like I did at nineteen
And twenty two

Feel confused and tired and tipsy
Horny but looking for love
Late but running for the train
The train to adulthood

I can still catch it if I just wear an unstained dress
If I just pick one solid guy and make myself fall for him
If I just choose one job career and pull through
even though I hate every minute of it

Then maybe I will someday reach that famous next level
Maybe then I won’t think twenty four is that bad
Maybe I will think back at it and smile.

Karoline's Blog

Pictures on Tinder

I have horrible taste in men. I’m just saying. As I sit here, wasting my time away by swipes my finger from side to side, I’ve started to notice a pattern.
We’re all the same.
We judge people based on 2-3 carefully chosen profile pictures and then have an idea what that person is like.
Gosh, it’s tiring.

But I might as well get something useful out of all the millions of hours I have spent thinking the next swipe will be the one.

So here are some typical Tinder pictures (for guys) and what they actually mean:

  • The baby picture

“I promise I don’t have a baby, but now you know I’m capable of holding one and isn’t that damn adorable. Doesn’t that make me more f***able?” Sure… Well done. But if I read ” not my baby” one more time I’m deleting the app (just kidding I need love in my life and this is the only one I can use in my bed, while eating icecream).
And if you do have a baby then please let me know before we go out, so I can put that into my specific love equation that lets me know if we belong together or not.

  • Surfboard
  1. Look at my hot body
  2. Look at my hot body holding this hot surfboard
  3. Imagine me surfing
  4. Are you imagining a hot Australian guy like Chris Hemsworth.
  5. Now close your eyes and think of him while we…

I mean… It’s cool. It’s hot. If you actually know how to work it and don’t fall off, I’m in.

  • Selfie

Please no. All I’m imagining is you, alone, in your room, trying 6 different poses to get that selfie just right… Nah

  • Animals

Here I want to highlight the grant amount of cute doggy and kitty pictures that float around Tinder and other social media love apps. It’s cute. Especially since you KNOW we will give you a like SIMPLY because it would be downright RUDE to turn down such an amazingly cute animal. I have no idea what the guy in the pictures looks like but GOSH you found a cute animal to take a picture with (because most of them aren’t yours anyway)

  • Jumping in front of cool travel spots

Wow, you travel. Welcome to 2018. Everybody’s been to Thailand. Go to the moon and I’ll be impressed. Or better yet go to Wisconsin (no offense to Wisconsin it just has a nice ring to the name and I’m not sure it’s a huge Instagram spot if it is I’m sorry).

  • Musical instruments

Aka. the guitar. Aka. wanna hear me play John Mayer? DO I???!? If you actually play the guitar (like the surfboard) that’s hot. If you’re trying to fake who you are, just don’t. I’ll find out sooner or later anyway.

  • The funny note

Finally! Some personality! I want to know who YOU are, not the Tinder robot you created while dreaming of all the hot girls this profile will get you. Be weird, be sassy, be ironic (again I have to warn you I do tend to have a weird taste in men so this may not apply to you all).

  • The “oh look I wear glasses sometimes” picture

“I can be hot. And sexy. And nerdy. Anything you want.” *****WARNING**** Major fetish reveal coming up… I love glasses. Those big nerdy hipster, spiderman, superman all man glasses. So please don’t think this is a bad thing. Also… you know once the glasses come off…

And last but not least. This is not a picture I know that but gosh. The importance and difference it makes must not to be forgotten…

  • The profile text

YAS! If you can write a good, original, funny, somewhat creepy in a charming way profile text then I am yours. All the previous judgments and assumptions I had about you before. POOF evaporates. Just like that. You must be a BLAST to hang out with and I will do my best to consider it before I after 15 minutes of swiping decide that love is hopeless and I should just buy a cat or a turtle.. Where was I? Oh yeah. If you can catch me in those 15 minutes of love and hope, WOW well done you!

So yeah. I guess that was it for me.
Now I can go back to stare at strangers I will never meet, but perhaps one day will marry. What a great world we live in.

Till next time.

Ps. I have no idea who that guy in the picture is. Is was the first thing to come up when I googled Tinder pictures. Sorry handsome but unknown fellow. This isn’t pointed at you I promise.

Funny, Karoline's Blog, Written Words

Roskilde Festival 2014 vs 2018


Ja tak. Så er jeg kommet hjem fra en vild og voldsom uge på Roskilde.
Meen? Var det ligeså fedt og voldsomt som da jeg sidste gang var afsted i 2014.
Har jeg ændret mig eller har festivalen.
Let’s dive in.

– Tøjet

2014: Måske var jeg bare klam men jeg husker det som om ALLE tog deres grimmeste tøj på og stank som jeg ved ikke hvad hele ugen. Bad var ikke meget omtalt og to i løbet af ugen var rigeligt. Man havde ironiske bøllehatte på (inden de blev seje), morfars gamle striktrøje og smadret H&M tøj på man kunne kyle ud efter. Men det var okay. For vi var fælles om det. Bæltetasken var praktisk og havde en formål (ikke få dine ting stjålet). Den var ikke en del af et sæt.

2018: Wow, wow wow. Hvilket modeshow. Hvilket rent hår. Hvilken duft (sådan næsten da). Jeg var overrasket over hvor godt folk så ud. Planlagte outfits, deres pæneste kjoler klemt ned i rygsækken og solbrillen på plads. Intet var tilfældigt. Hvilket er lidt ærgeligt. Vi kan altid se godt ud. Er det ikke fedt at være grim bare en enkelt uge om året 😉

– Mobiler

2014: Smartphones var der, selvfølgelig var de det. Men jeg husker dem slet ikke (måske forbi jeg ikke havde en). De var ikke tilstede. Folk efterlod dem derhjemme i frygt for at de blev nappet. Man fandt sin gamle Nokia 6210 frem og løb op til opladerstanden hver anden dag for at få den opladt over natten. “Men hvad så hvis folk ville have fat på dig” tænker du? Surt show, de måtte vente. Og man måtte pænt skrive tilbage “Sorry den var til opladning”. Man var fri. Mere villig til at møde nye mennesker, spørge om ting, være i nuet. Men det er vist en længere samtale.

2018: Smartphones alle vegne. De bedste instaposes, de sjoveste stories, stirren i mobilen, afhængigheden, akavetheden reddet pga. den sorte skærm foran dig. Øv. Der røg lidt af fællesskabet. Man kan jo ikke leve uden den efterhånden. Derfor kom Volt. Så du kan få en ny opladt powerbank en gang i døgnet så du ALDRIG skal opleve den rædselsfulde oplevelse at gå hen til en person, kigge dem i øjnene, og spørge om vej til Arena. For du har din app. Du har dit google maps. Du har Tinder så kærligheden i virkeligheden er også overvurderet. Du skal tjekke likes. Osv. osv. Ikke at jeg er imod smartphones eller noget…


– Alderen

2014: Let’s be real. Jeg var naturligvis yngre i 2014. Lige blevet student, ankom fuld, uden stemme og klar til at fyre den af. 20 år, single og ready to mingle. Intet kunne stoppe mig. Man drak sig bare ned hver aften for så sov man hurtigere og tømmermænd var ikke et begreb jeg kendte til. Tror endda det var det år jeg blev gift med en nordmand. Men det er en anden historie.

2018: 24 år. Fuldtidsarbejde, relativt mere fornuftig, tidligt i seng for at være klar til næste dag. Disse er ting jeg er stolte af, men bestemt ikke ord jeg forbandt med Roskilde Festival. Men dette år var det sandt. Jeg sagde glædeligt ja til at arbejde 7 ud af festivalens 8 dage i 7,5 time om dagen. Men når man stadig er 24 år, single og alt det der, så vil man stadig gerne nyde det. Og det var der også tid til.

Men kan vi lige snakke om hvor unge folk er. Der er jo 17-årige piger i bikini der spiller fodbold i sæbevand… Nu lyder jeg gammel, det ved jeg godt. Men min søde fremtidige datter skal bestemt ikke på Roskilde som 17 år. Især ikke når jeg tænker på mit første år på Roskilde som 17 år… Siger det bare… Ikke de bedste beslutninger der blev truffet der.

Men i år var jeg fornuftig. Og træt. Åh så træt hver aften. Jeg frøs. Og blev ædru og ville hjem og sove i min eget rene telt i mediecampen hvor der var stille. Men det er fint. Vi bliver alle gamle og vi kan ikke blive ved med at drikke hjernen ud og løbet forvirret rundt med en ølpong i den ene hånd og toiletpapir i den anden mens man desperat leder efter et toilet eller sine venner eller sin bøllehat eller hvad hulen man ellers lavede dengang var man 17-20 år. Åh det var tider.



2014: Pesto, rugbrød, minut-nudler, mere pesto. Sådan der. Ugen er reddet. Alle ved jo at en 3 kroners minut-nudler virkelig ligger en god solid bund inden man drikker 24 øl.

2018: Dixieburger, kylling i Karry, uhh har du hørt om det der sushi sted. Sagde du 108 kr for en ris-ret. Ja okay så pyt…. Av av av. Maden er dyr på Roskilde. Men jeg kan simpelthent ikke længere orke at slæbe dåsemakrel osv med på Roskilde. Men så er det jo godt der rent faktisk er et super godt udvalg hele ugen. Ærligt, det er nok det mest rigtige mad jeg har fået på en uge hele året.



Jeg tror det vi sammen kan konstatere er, at måske er det ikke så meget Roskilde Festival der har ændret sig. Måske er det bare mig der har gennemgået den ting som Peter Pan frygter mest. Adulthood… Just kidding, er der ikke helt endnu, men jeg nærmer mig og det tror jeg nu også er helt okay. Vi kan ikke alle leve af spand i en uge og tro det ikke har nogen konsekvenser. Det har det nok ikke, men måske ikke gør det hver uge alligevel.

Men lad mig slutte af med at sige. Wow Roskilde Festival er et fantastisk sted. Fantastisk stemning. Fantastiske mennesker. Og det er ligemeget om de nu har flottere tøj på, spiser rigtigt mad og poserer til Instagram. Vi er stadig fælles om det.

Till next year.



Karoline's Blog

Demands for future lovers

When I was younger, finding a boyfriend was so easy.

He just had to be cute and popular. Make me laugh and like my friends.
Lately, it seems like a different story. As if there are too many factors and demands to think about. Too many checkboxes to check off before you will even consider dating that person.

Here are the new considerations I have when deciding if I like someone or not (which is also stupid seeing that you can’t choose who you like. It just happens. But when you’re single and bored this is what you do. Consider everyone you see or know)

  1. Last name. I never thought about this. But I obviously want my future husband to have a beautiful last name that goes well with my name as well. I can’t be called Karoline Kooler Karlsen or something weird like that. The initials just don’t really have a nice tone…
  2. Children. Does he want them? When does he want them? If he’s much older than me, he prob wants them waaay sooner than I. I’m “only” 24″ so still have a few years before I want to start considering that. But if he’s 30, I’d worry it’s on his mind NOW. But then again if he’s much younger I’d have to wait TOO long.. Gosh.
  3. Age. Which made me think of age. I want someone I can talk about my childhood with, but also want him to be mature and have an adult job. So a bit older than me.
  4. Job. Jobs weren’t even really a subject when we were younger. If he worked at the cinema it was a plus cuz then you could get free popcorn. Now it’s more complicated than that. I have a tendency to fall for creative types. Aka. unemployed boys. Not men. Not suit-owning, let me treat you, let’s go to Paris kind of guys. I don’t care if they’re crazy rich, that’s not it. But I want the freedom to be able to do what we want to do. I have my own money, and I want him to know how to handle his money as well. This seems like quite a big subject lately.
  5. Family. I love my family. I want my family to love my future husband. I want my future husband to love my family. I want us all to be ONE BIG FAMILY. You get me. Right?
  6. Timing. Gosh… If my best friend has a baby in two years, then I need to have a baby in two years cuz those kids have to either be best friends or get married. It’s all about timing. My kids have to play with my brother’s kids so we have to time that as well. I know we can’t choose when to fall in love and all that, but gosh wouldn’t that be nice.
  7. Hobbies. This is a hard one. Opposites attract and all that. But what if he likes pop and I like heavy metal (killing stereotypes and all that. It’s very inn in 2018). What if he wants to watch action movies and I love musicals. He hates traveling and I can’t breathe without it. Some things are just hard to choose and live without. We have to time them just right, so we like some of the same things, but aren’t the EXACT same person.
  8. Country. Where should we live? Where does he live? Where do we want to work? Should we move around? Stay grounded? Get bored? I don’t even know where I’m heading with this one. I guess I just have a slight feeling I’ll end up with someone from another country (really Karoline what makes you think that. Maybe the fact that you haven’t dated a Danish guy since you were 17).
  9. Way of life. Is he a morning person? Super fit and will blame me and my Nutella obsession (then I obviously won’t marry him but you get it). Is he cheap or does he spend all his money on stupid things? Will he force me to throw out all my CD’s….. Please don’t…!
  10. I guess the thing is. Will we fit well in the long run? Will we be able to make each other happy? Laugh every day. Be able to be good parents while still remembering to love each other. Be able to grow up and get wrinkly and still look into those eyes and think of that special day when we swiped right. Or locked eyes in the metro. Or bumped into each other drunk at a music festival.

I suppose all these thoughts keep running through my brain which makes the first date quite stressed. I know you can’t know till you know. That I don’t have to meet the one right now and I can just have fun and meet him when the time is right.

But am I the only one who has these thoughts. The only one who considers every single thing about a guy before I allow my heart to fall hard. For if it’s not right, not perfect, is it even worth it?
Yes. Yes, it is. Each person leads us closer to the right one.
Hopefully one day I’ll find someone whom I can check all the important boxes. Not in a perfect way. But in the way that’s perfect for us.

Karoline's Blog, Written Words


Adulthood is a funny destination. You never truly know when you have arrive. What age you should be. If you have to come alone, with friends or just show up when you feel ready.

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about adulthood. Running towards it. Running away from it. Not really sure how I feel about the term.

When I was younger, adulthood was at 23. When you had your life together, big apartment with your one truly love whom you could travel the world with before you got married and started popping out children.

Here in reality, my 24th birthday is creeping in on me and I’m nowhere near that dream. I was so afraid of getting older that I booked a flight to the “party central” city of Budapest. If I’m not home, it’s not really happening.

I suppose we can’t choose whether or not we grow up. I know plenty of “grownups” with kids and everything, who are by no means “adults”. And that’s okay. But that doesn’t mean we should all run about and praise Peter Pan. There’s some beauty to be held in adulthood. Some excitement to being referred to by this name (yes I just watched Call Me By Your Name, and it’s amazing).

Which is why I want to tell you about my experiences as a tween turned teen turned twenty something turned quarterlife crisis turned adulting turning adult.

We will go far together. We will cry. We will laugh. You will laugh and cry because you see my pain. You feel it too. We will all laugh because of how pathetic we are but it’s okay. We will drink wine and eat garlic bread. And maybe one day… we will grow up and spend our time more wisely than on writing this ….

But for now let’s just stay in this beautiful moment that is #adulting.

See you soon!