Poetry, Written Words

That time of the month

It’s that time of the month
when nothing seems to go my way

When my hopes and dreams
seem further away than before

When the light is broken
and darkness surrounds me

It’s that time of the month
when getting up is harder
than falling asleep

When one word
can turn into tears
and one problem 
turn to a million

I see no end to this
but know it will be over
before the week ends

I see no solution
but know possibilities 
and happiness
awaits in the morning

That time will pass soon
this time will be great
and control will be in my reach
once more

Poetry, Written Words

Mirror

A mirror is like looking into a persons soul.
Their expression when they find one, will tell you everything you need to know.
Their mood, happiness and feelings, are measured by how that person in the mirror stares back at them. Are they happy? Sad? Fat? Thin?
A lot can be said about that person. A lot of words can be screamed. Not nice, not useful. Anything goes.

When I look into the mirror I stare. I stare for minutes, sometimes for hours. I look for answers. If the mirror can't tell me what's wrong, then no one can. If the mirror can't make me smile, then no one can.

I have tried loving it. Hating it. Breaking it.. but they're everywhere. Glass, water, reflections. They follow me around.
Look here, look there, I'm back again. Love me, notice me, look at me.

And I do. I go back every time hoping something has changed. Hoping something is new and better. But it never is. I guess I'll just have to live with it and smile back. Hoping.

It will all be okay.

Poetry, Written Words

Inspiration

Sometimes inspiration hits you. Like water flowing in the air, hitting your face hard, harsh and heavy.

Waking you up to your true life, where you’re awake and aware.

Cautious of lies and liars walking around freely like criminals in the street.
Walking without a care, chewing gum and grinning.
Smiling because they know they hurt you.

The best thing they’ve done.  The worst thing they’ve done. I believe, I think, I am. But where and how and why.

Million of voices, but only you are there. I don’t know how to make it go away. I just know I have to act when it arrives. Just know I have to do, not not do.

You brought it back. Back to me. Back to life.

I am back. 

Poetry, Written Words

Words…

I love how words can lift me up to the unknown parts of my brain.

I love how they make me tingle and dance in my dreams and belly.

I feel twisted, as if I’ve been twirled around all night by a cute smile.

My heart leaves bigger noises behind than normally.

My hair shines brighter and my mouth feels dry.

I lick my lips and smile knowingly.

I don’t know why, but I just know it.

 

Cloud-like walking on the bare ground, the air feels lighter and smoother.

Words can do all this.

We just have to let them sink in.

Truly read them and not just skim.

Believe and breathe them like a delicious ice creme melting on your fingertips.

Hurry before it’s gone.

Hurry before you give up and throw everything out of sight.

I see you.

I see you through the words you write to me, and the stories they tell between the lines.

About you and only you.

Words are beautiful.

Words are poetry.

We just have to put them together in the correct order.

Like lego pieces.

Millions of colors and shapes, but only one solution.

You found it.

You mesmerized me and made my feet stop and my eyes stare.

Fire and lighting behind me, but I see only the words.

Your words.

Your true self. 

Poetry, Written Words

Unanswered messages

When I get stressed I don't answer. I let the messages haunt me with their nonstop reminders, but I simply cannot get myself to open them. If I open, then I have to respond. And if I respond I will get a response. Message after message of unwanted information stealing my time and concentration. Making me feel worse than I did before. People are just a toy we play with before we get to the real thing. Alonesomness. Alone time so we can sit and stare into a screen and wonder why it's not us, smiling in the picture next to other happy people. Why people no longer invite us, because we're refused to go the last 15 times. Because we were too busy thinking about answering instead of just doing it. Because we were so far out in our minds that we couldn't even see the world flash before our eyes. Waving at you, wanting you to join in, but you continued to live inside your head, wondering when it all went wrong. When you stopped being social, when you preferred fictional characters to real people and when you felt lonely in every situation. Maybe one might say you should simply stop thinking. Stop wondering. And just live. It's sound so easy. So pleasant. Just write, get it all out. So here I am. Writing. Expressing. Living.

Poetry, Written Words

Running words

Poetry has a way of coming to me in the most unusual of places. Here I am, minding my own business and then I see them. The words come crawling towards me, yelling at me to write them down before they dissappear. But how can I? I am in a shower in a new hostel in freaking Latvia? Why do you do this to me? It's as if they come in pairs. Once the first one is done a new one is lurking to take its place. Haunting me all over again. I want to run naked through the hall but feel somewhat rude to the people around me, they won't understand the hurry, the need. But I do. I want to run, to chase after the words and hold them down till they're mine forever. Locked in place and time. And here I am. Doing my best to remember them as they were at that time. They've changed surely. Maybe for the better, maybe for the worse? We'll never know. But here they are.

Poetry, Written Words

Mindless wander

I hate when my friends say I drunk when I'm not
I hate when strangers say I'm drunk when I'm not
I hate when I'm drunk and I don't want to face it
This innocence yet adult atmosphere is confusing my mind when it doesn't know which way to go
When I can't find my way my wanderlust mind and soul takes over and leads me where I need to go

I say and sing without words,
I shout and scream but no one is listening
They simply nod
Tries to understand
But without getting a word
I want to find my person
The one who make the wrong answers right
And changes sunlight into sun bright
I wish you were there to see it
See it all
It's over in the morning
Over before it ends
For I don't know how to start it
Just know how to scribble it down
Before it leaves my mind
An leaves me mindless once again