Dear Facebook

Dear Facebook

Yes it’s me

I’m still alive.

No, I didn’t run away with a Japanese guy

No, I didn’t show you all the amazing things I saw in Japan

I didn’t even tell you I went to Japan

I let you all down.

Made you worry

Some of you even called

to ask if I was okay?

If I had a good vacation?

If I’m being honest I just needed a break

I needed a break from being social

So I could actually be social

So I could join the real world

I know you are suppose to write a big post about it and tell you all the things I hate about modern society and our lack of social skills

But to be honest I was just tired

Tired of waisting my time and regretting it

Tired of thinking about what other people might think

Tired of living my life for someone else

So I didn’t

I just lived and smiled

It wasn’t groundbreaking or revolutionary

I didn’t do it to inspire or preach

I just did it because I felt like it

And when I feel like returning to the online social society

I will

Just like that



29 august 2018

If I could be honest with you

I’d tell you I miss you

Tell you I wish we were back in each other’s arms

Everything was much easier back then

But admitting that to your face would be like admitting I regret the ending

But I don’t

We needed that time apart to find our true selves

Figure out who we are

Figure out who we wanted to be

If I had the courage I would tell you I miss you

Tell you I miss the sense of comfort and belonging that you gave to me

You were my first

First heartbreak

First love

If you were in front of me I would walk closer to you

Look into your eyes

The eyes I know so well

The eyes that make me weak

I would tell you I love you

Tell you I’d never let you go again

But this won’t happen

You are not here

And I am not brave enough

Just naive


Twenty four

I guess I thought life would be different at twenty four

That I wouldn’t wake up with the smell of wine stuck between my teeth

That I would have gotten sick of kissing strangers

Sick of thinking of the same old love

Sick of regretting the same things

Twenty four seemed like the age I would have my life together

Would know my goals and aim for them

Clean my room and always take out the trash

Always wear high heels for birthdays

Always look my best

But I feel just like I did at nineteen

And twenty two

Feel confused and tired and tipsy

Horny but looking for love

Late but running for the train

The train to adulthood

I can still catch it if I just wear an unstained dress

If I just pick one solid guy and make myself fall for him

If I just choose one job career and pull through even though I hate every minute of it

Then maybe I will someday reach that famous next level

Maybe then I won’t think twenty four is that bad

Maybe I will think back at it and smile.


Love or loneliness

19 August 00:40

People always talk about love or lust.

But what about love or loneliness.

Do we ever just stay with someone just because we’re scared to be alone.

For the comfort?

You know when it’s love.

You know when you can’t stop feeling the sparks flying and the bobbles flowing.

But what if it’s just not happening. Something is not right.

But you stay with them because it’s better than not having someone there.

Better than sleeping alone all those night.

Comfort is a nice place but also a scary one. You quickly get used to it and it’s really hard to get out of.

Suddenly you start mistaking comfort and safety with love.

Suddenly you can’t picture you’re life without that someone next to you simply because you like the warm breath on your neck.

It could be anybody.

It just happened to be you cuz I got tired of looking.

Got sick of the game before I made it till the end.

So I stopped a halfway and tricked myself into believing I had won first prize.

But I didn’t.

Suddenly one day you wake up and realize you stayed for all the wrong reasons.

For the touch,

the kind words,

the attention,

the eagerness,

the accessory,

the role.

But it’s not him.

You can’t fake love.

You can’t fake real feelings.

Lust is easy to fake.

Comfort is hard to find.

But love it forever and once you find it you’ll know it.

– I don’t want to fall in love with comfort

Karoline's Blog

Pictures on Tinder

I have horrible taste in men. I’m just saying. As I sit here, wasting my time away by swipes my finger from side to side, I’ve started to notice a pattern.
We’re all the same.
We judge people based on 2-3 carefully chosen profile pictures and then have an idea what that person is like.
Gosh, it’s tiring.

But I might as well get something useful out of all the millions of hours I have spent thinking the next swipe will be the one.

So here are some typical Tinder pictures (for guys) and what they actually mean:

  • The baby picture

“I promise I don’t have a baby, but now you know I’m capable of holding one and isn’t that damn adorable. Doesn’t that make me more f***able?” Sure… Well done. But if I read ” not my baby” one more time I’m deleting the app (just kidding I need love in my life and this is the only one I can use in my bed, while eating icecream).
And if you do have a baby then please let me know before we go out, so I can put that into my specific love equation that lets me know if we belong together or not.

  • Surfboard
  1. Look at my hot body
  2. Look at my hot body holding this hot surfboard
  3. Imagine me surfing
  4. Are you imagining a hot Australian guy like Chris Hemsworth.
  5. Now close your eyes and think of him while we…

I mean… It’s cool. It’s hot. If you actually know how to work it and don’t fall off, I’m in.

  • Selfie

Please no. All I’m imagining is you, alone, in your room, trying 6 different poses to get that selfie just right… Nah

  • Animals

Here I want to highlight the grant amount of cute doggy and kitty pictures that float around Tinder and other social media love apps. It’s cute. Especially since you KNOW we will give you a like SIMPLY because it would be downright RUDE to turn down such an amazingly cute animal. I have no idea what the guy in the pictures looks like but GOSH you found a cute animal to take a picture with (because most of them aren’t yours anyway)

  • Jumping in front of cool travel spots

Wow, you travel. Welcome to 2018. Everybody’s been to Thailand. Go to the moon and I’ll be impressed. Or better yet go to Wisconsin (no offense to Wisconsin it just has a nice ring to the name and I’m not sure it’s a huge Instagram spot if it is I’m sorry).

  • Musical instruments

Aka. the guitar. Aka. wanna hear me play John Mayer? DO I???!? If you actually play the guitar (like the surfboard) that’s hot. If you’re trying to fake who you are, just don’t. I’ll find out sooner or later anyway.

  • The funny note

Finally! Some personality! I want to know who YOU are, not the Tinder robot you created while dreaming of all the hot girls this profile will get you. Be weird, be sassy, be ironic (again I have to warn you I do tend to have a weird taste in men so this may not apply to you all).

  • The “oh look I wear glasses sometimes” picture

“I can be hot. And sexy. And nerdy. Anything you want.” *****WARNING**** Major fetish reveal coming up… I love glasses. Those big nerdy hipster, spiderman, superman all man glasses. So please don’t think this is a bad thing. Also… you know once the glasses come off…

And last but not least. This is not a picture I know that but gosh. The importance and difference it makes must not to be forgotten…

  • The profile text

YAS! If you can write a good, original, funny, somewhat creepy in a charming way profile text then I am yours. All the previous judgments and assumptions I had about you before. POOF evaporates. Just like that. You must be a BLAST to hang out with and I will do my best to consider it before I after 15 minutes of swiping decide that love is hopeless and I should just buy a cat or a turtle.. Where was I? Oh yeah. If you can catch me in those 15 minutes of love and hope, WOW well done you!

So yeah. I guess that was it for me.
Now I can go back to stare at strangers I will never meet, but perhaps one day will marry. What a great world we live in.

Till next time.

Ps. I have no idea who that guy in the picture is. Is was the first thing to come up when I googled Tinder pictures. Sorry handsome but unknown fellow. This isn’t pointed at you I promise.

Funny, Karoline's Blog, Written Words

Roskilde Festival 2014 vs 2018


Ja tak. Så er jeg kommet hjem fra en vild og voldsom uge på Roskilde.
Meen? Var det ligeså fedt og voldsomt som da jeg sidste gang var afsted i 2014.
Har jeg ændret mig eller har festivalen.
Let’s dive in.

– Tøjet

2014: Måske var jeg bare klam men jeg husker det som om ALLE tog deres grimmeste tøj på og stank som jeg ved ikke hvad hele ugen. Bad var ikke meget omtalt og to i løbet af ugen var rigeligt. Man havde ironiske bøllehatte på (inden de blev seje), morfars gamle striktrøje og smadret H&M tøj på man kunne kyle ud efter. Men det var okay. For vi var fælles om det. Bæltetasken var praktisk og havde en formål (ikke få dine ting stjålet). Den var ikke en del af et sæt.

2018: Wow, wow wow. Hvilket modeshow. Hvilket rent hår. Hvilken duft (sådan næsten da). Jeg var overrasket over hvor godt folk så ud. Planlagte outfits, deres pæneste kjoler klemt ned i rygsækken og solbrillen på plads. Intet var tilfældigt. Hvilket er lidt ærgeligt. Vi kan altid se godt ud. Er det ikke fedt at være grim bare en enkelt uge om året 😉

– Mobiler

2014: Smartphones var der, selvfølgelig var de det. Men jeg husker dem slet ikke (måske forbi jeg ikke havde en). De var ikke tilstede. Folk efterlod dem derhjemme i frygt for at de blev nappet. Man fandt sin gamle Nokia 6210 frem og løb op til opladerstanden hver anden dag for at få den opladt over natten. “Men hvad så hvis folk ville have fat på dig” tænker du? Surt show, de måtte vente. Og man måtte pænt skrive tilbage “Sorry den var til opladning”. Man var fri. Mere villig til at møde nye mennesker, spørge om ting, være i nuet. Men det er vist en længere samtale.

2018: Smartphones alle vegne. De bedste instaposes, de sjoveste stories, stirren i mobilen, afhængigheden, akavetheden reddet pga. den sorte skærm foran dig. Øv. Der røg lidt af fællesskabet. Man kan jo ikke leve uden den efterhånden. Derfor kom Volt. Så du kan få en ny opladt powerbank en gang i døgnet så du ALDRIG skal opleve den rædselsfulde oplevelse at gå hen til en person, kigge dem i øjnene, og spørge om vej til Arena. For du har din app. Du har dit google maps. Du har Tinder så kærligheden i virkeligheden er også overvurderet. Du skal tjekke likes. Osv. osv. Ikke at jeg er imod smartphones eller noget…


– Alderen

2014: Let’s be real. Jeg var naturligvis yngre i 2014. Lige blevet student, ankom fuld, uden stemme og klar til at fyre den af. 20 år, single og ready to mingle. Intet kunne stoppe mig. Man drak sig bare ned hver aften for så sov man hurtigere og tømmermænd var ikke et begreb jeg kendte til. Tror endda det var det år jeg blev gift med en nordmand. Men det er en anden historie.

2018: 24 år. Fuldtidsarbejde, relativt mere fornuftig, tidligt i seng for at være klar til næste dag. Disse er ting jeg er stolte af, men bestemt ikke ord jeg forbandt med Roskilde Festival. Men dette år var det sandt. Jeg sagde glædeligt ja til at arbejde 7 ud af festivalens 8 dage i 7,5 time om dagen. Men når man stadig er 24 år, single og alt det der, så vil man stadig gerne nyde det. Og det var der også tid til.

Men kan vi lige snakke om hvor unge folk er. Der er jo 17-årige piger i bikini der spiller fodbold i sæbevand… Nu lyder jeg gammel, det ved jeg godt. Men min søde fremtidige datter skal bestemt ikke på Roskilde som 17 år. Især ikke når jeg tænker på mit første år på Roskilde som 17 år… Siger det bare… Ikke de bedste beslutninger der blev truffet der.

Men i år var jeg fornuftig. Og træt. Åh så træt hver aften. Jeg frøs. Og blev ædru og ville hjem og sove i min eget rene telt i mediecampen hvor der var stille. Men det er fint. Vi bliver alle gamle og vi kan ikke blive ved med at drikke hjernen ud og løbet forvirret rundt med en ølpong i den ene hånd og toiletpapir i den anden mens man desperat leder efter et toilet eller sine venner eller sin bøllehat eller hvad hulen man ellers lavede dengang var man 17-20 år. Åh det var tider.



2014: Pesto, rugbrød, minut-nudler, mere pesto. Sådan der. Ugen er reddet. Alle ved jo at en 3 kroners minut-nudler virkelig ligger en god solid bund inden man drikker 24 øl.

2018: Dixieburger, kylling i Karry, uhh har du hørt om det der sushi sted. Sagde du 108 kr for en ris-ret. Ja okay så pyt…. Av av av. Maden er dyr på Roskilde. Men jeg kan simpelthent ikke længere orke at slæbe dåsemakrel osv med på Roskilde. Men så er det jo godt der rent faktisk er et super godt udvalg hele ugen. Ærligt, det er nok det mest rigtige mad jeg har fået på en uge hele året.



Jeg tror det vi sammen kan konstatere er, at måske er det ikke så meget Roskilde Festival der har ændret sig. Måske er det bare mig der har gennemgået den ting som Peter Pan frygter mest. Adulthood… Just kidding, er der ikke helt endnu, men jeg nærmer mig og det tror jeg nu også er helt okay. Vi kan ikke alle leve af spand i en uge og tro det ikke har nogen konsekvenser. Det har det nok ikke, men måske ikke gør det hver uge alligevel.

Men lad mig slutte af med at sige. Wow Roskilde Festival er et fantastisk sted. Fantastisk stemning. Fantastiske mennesker. Og det er ligemeget om de nu har flottere tøj på, spiser rigtigt mad og poserer til Instagram. Vi er stadig fælles om det.

Till next year.




Meant to be

17 june 2018 8:53

It was meant to be

Written in the stars

that’s what they all say

Before those were just words in a sentence

Before that, was just sounds from a mouth

Suddenly I see the truth in them

Suddenly it seems as if it’s more than just a night

More than just a kiss

I saw you

Looked into your eyes all night

Talked about your family

Asked about my dreams

Our eyes grew tired as the sun came up

Our bodies fit together like a puzzle

No need to push

No need to adjust

It just said click

As I looked into the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen

I started to wonder

Will I see them again

Will I be in those arms once more

I sat down on the bed watching you dress

Hoping it would be true

All the things we said

The promises we made

I hoped it would be a way for the universe to show me

That this was where I was meant to be